NOT QUITE THE HONEYMOON

Yaaba:😭😭😭

Maame: Ayiforo!Why the tears? Sup?

Yaaba:🍆

Maame: Why? Is he not a man?

Yaaba: Maame that is not it, he is too much of a man!

Maame: What do you mean?

Yaaba: It cannot fit!

Maame:

Ah.. wait… 🤣🤣🤣🤣

But Kobby is so short and skinny, Sanaa he’s packed his height and weight somewhere!

Wait- are you for real?

Yaaba: 🙄I am going to pretend that you didn’t say that. Do I look like I’m Kalybos’ing right now?

Maame:

Wait- but – Ah it’s been it been almost a week!!!

Yaaba: I know!! Why do you think I am texting you?

Maame: but what are you using your phone for? Have you not asked brother google yet?

Yaaba: 😔Google is even more discouraging, I read the story of a couple who had issues for six months!

Maame: Eiiiiii! Eniɛ wear your seatbelt eh looool! How can you be virgining yourselves in marriage. Lol

Yaaba: This is not funny Maame, I think Kobby is very worried. I think there’s something wrong with me.

Maame: I am sorry. This is sensitive. Ok I am serious now. So, did brother google offer any solutions?

Yaaba: Well, there are recommended lubes to use.

Maame: And….?

Yaaba: We haven’t tried any yet.

Maame: Herh what do you mean by that? Or you naa you don’t want to do the do ehn?

Yaaba: I forgot to buy one!

Maame is typing

Yaaba: I know I messed up, stop writing the thesis!

Maame: Hold on, I need a second to process this. You mean to tell me that you, a virgin, who married another virgin forgot to take lube on your honeymoon. What were you hoping to happen exactly? Deliverance? It’s not as if both of you are criff too! I want to insult you but my fingers won’t be fast enough. Let me send a voice note.

Yaaba: Look who is insulting me, as if you would have done any better. Mtcheew. The real question here is, how are we going to get the lube now?

Maame: Ah! Madam, how is that my problem?

Yaaba: We went to the pharmacy to get some, but they have this weird type that I am afraid to use. I read about this XLube brand I think that would be best. I liked the reviews

Maame: Oh yeah I have heard about that brand

Yaaba: Ei are you not a virgin?!

Maame: Sister, Virgin does not mean my eyes and head, and my research faculties are virgin too. My eye red for my honeymoon wai. No child’s play there! I aspire to be too busy to know where my phone is koraa.

Yaaba: It’s ok, you don’t need to throw shades. I am already in the forest.

Maame: Lol ekutia biara nyim ne wura. So what’s the plan?

Yaaba: I want you to buy it in Accra, go to the cantonment pharmacy.

Maame: Herh you are a joke! Lmao! This has to make it to my blog! Lool “Girl sends bestfriend Sex Lube on her honeymoon! Rotflmao

Yaaba: What are friends for lol. This is “May day, May day”, Titanic Style🤣🤣🤣

Maame: lol let me rephrase: Girl saves virgin-bestfriend’s marriage by sending her emergency sex lube during honeymoon! Imagine the clicks, the views! I will hit roofffffff!

Yaaba: Maame be serious. Will you do this or nah?

Maame: Do I have a choice? Me I can’t look your Kupe husband in the eye when I get there. We will all know what I am there for. Too awkward charle. I feel like I will never be welcome in your home after this.

Yaaba: Simple koraa. Send a delivery guy.

Maame: Waa look! She has answers for everything too! Sharp girl, sharp girl, you didn’t buy lube for your own honeymoon!

Yaaba: lol,😘😘😘 I love you too! So you will send it in the early in the morning ehn?

Maame: Ei will they be open by 6am? I have to be at the Peace Awards meeting at 8.

Yaaba: Wo ni hao. They are a 24hr Pharmacy.

Maame: Boi, I can now tell that you are really desperate lol

Yaaba: I really am!!
We didn’t wait 4 years for this!!!

Maame: Of course you didnt! 100k wedding and the 16 Bridesmaids and groomsmen!

Nyinaa ekyere no show! You people shock fans herh!

Yaaba: Madam! I know I owe you for life, Issokay don’t play my apawa here.

Maame: You really do! I don’t know what can beat this! Breathtaking photos breaking the gram but you struggling to break the important tin🤣🤣🤣😭🤣😭🤣

Yaaba:🤦🏾‍♀️ I’m dead!

Maame: You’re no where close to death. In fact, you haven’t even closed your eyes to sleep. I’m going to dedicate a whole blog post to you! I’ll send you a text when I send the delivery guy.

Yaaba: You know this is why I love you right?

Maame: Oh gerrout!

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6 thoughts on “NOT QUITE THE HONEYMOON

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